Trick or Treat

I found myself tending to the kids trick-or-treating on Halloween. Wearing full scarface gear, scar, machine gun and everything. I'm playing San Andreas while listening to Odd future in my living room greeting any child at my doorstep with tricks and treats. I should include one slight detail: I'm tripping balls. Interacting with children has been proven to be both amusing and difficult. Amusing because most kids don't know who scarface is so I put on a cop hat and tell 'em I'm working' for da county sheriff's office. *wink/nudge* and I give me a flick of my wrist like Paul Muni in the 1932 scarface. The difficult part is when your forced to reason with these 12 year old rascals. They ask "trick or treat?" like they don't really know what their asking for. I, of coarse respond "treat!" and give them some candy while my hallucinating brain is still trying to grasp the "trick" aspect of the question. because they're a ton of tricks going on in my head. And who pulls tricks anymore these days? What if someone responded back to the kids like "TRICK!" then grabbed em and kidnapped em. That's what is really going on in my head while I'm telling kids to grab some candy and shit.

Summer Madness in Milwuakee

Alright so it's that time where I muster up enough effort to write a blog entry for the first time in a while. I'm The Herb Korbin, I'm currently spending time in the best city in America during the summertime. At least that's what I thought when I was trippin' on 3 hits of LSD seeing Girl Talk live at Summerfest, the largest music festival in Milwaukee fucking Wisconsin. As a fresh new 21 year old, it was a unique and enjoyable experience. I had a pocket full of cash, a couple girls to dance with and a head full of... oh my gahhhh... wha? After that, the following Tuesday, at Summerfest I snuck into the VIP balcony at Wiz Khalifa. I managed to smoke a joint during one of my favorite tracks under the radar of police watching over the grounds. Anyways the last day I went to Summerfest, I saw the best damn live performance provided by none other than THE FLAMING LIPS.
Although throughout most of Summerfest I was digesting a lot of mind altering substances, I managed to maintain a good healthy wallet during the whole experience by selling drugs and weed to friends before going out to party. I've been wasting hours of my life when I'm not working or wasting time under the effects of hallucinogens by playing Grand Theft Auto: Vice City on my computer, I'm trying to get to 100%.
I can't get past 99%... Now it's a week later and I'm a little broke after paying this months bills and I'm on day 3 of an MDMA binge. I got knocked off the right track when I lost my second job I was holdin' down when summer started and now I'm just cruising on the bad track, snortin' pour ecstasy because it feels good to get a little bad. There's a dark side of me and he's very hungry.
Sloppy seconds is my preference, except when I feed on the flesh of a pedestrian. What does the future hold? I'm two characters in my own story and the story hasn't even gotten to the climax...

Actions speak louder than words, let me try this shit...

DEAD.











Here's a few songs you can find on my personal summer playlist:


Windowlicker by Aphex Twin, it's the perfect song for MDMA...

Some of the best lyricism I've heard in rap music in years by Tyler the Creator, Odd Future GOLF WANG Kill Them All, bitch.

Silver Trembling Hands by The Flaming Lips, of coarse

Summer Wasting by Belle & Sebastian

A collection of great 80's jams off of the Vice City radio/soundtrack such as

Love My Way by The Psychedelic Furs

(Keep Feeling) Fascination by Human League

Sunglasses At Night by Corey Hart

Summer Madness by Kool & the Gang and

I Ran (So Far Away) by A Flock of Seagulls

4/21: The Day After

Protect your neck. Become a gangster. It's a mentality I have to get into if I ever want to get my name out there and make it BIG. It's a dog eat dog world and if somebody can't get their shit together and get some real business done now-a-days, they get canned! That's who it's always has been. Always will be too. Survival of the fittest. That's why I've been making somewhat of a change in the way I view this world. Used to be, I just would do what needed to be done, the bare-minimum and chose to smoke and sleep to relieve stress of doing the minimum. I was burying myself in a hole as everyone else was growing, learning, moving forward for better or for worse. I didn't have faith in applying my efforts towards any cause other than my personal belief of peace on earth. More like sleep on earth. I am working at restructuring a path to climb out of this hole I'm in and grow/go farther than most others have grown/gone. I must be the change I want to see in the world. Change a society with my image of a complete resource based economy. But I can't do it in the state my life is in right now. I'm picking myself up but I need a few essentials to get things started. First I'm going to RUN. Running is healthy for you and I'm really concerned about the overall health of the people in this country. I need to stay healthy, active, and eat right so I can avoid turning out like just another fat and lazy American. Run faster than the average man, it'll keep you one step ahead of everyone. Next, I need to get my DRIVE on lock down. Can't make the scene on time without the right wheels. Driving the Lambo is fun but I can't drive it all day everyday, it's more of a show-room car, don't want to wreck it in a collision or anything. Which is why I'm riding around in a piece of shit Saturn that is boring and plain. Like Sam Lawry's car that gets blown up by kids in Brazil. I think I'm gonna get a motorcycle, it's more fuel efficient and a lot more badass to be scene riding around in. I can score some serious character points if a ride a motorcycle, all fuckin' right?! Third is an important step. FIGHT for your rights. I'm done being a pussy dealing with this bull shit. Now I see the light, I've got to get up, stand up for my rights. I'll have you know that I am a black belt in Karate, it's just been quite a long time since I participated in any form of martial arts. Once I get my own crib in the city, I am for sure going to find a dojo and brush up on my fighting skills. Last but not least, actually the most important, COLLECT. Collect that paper, get cash money, and get paid. If all the other steps can't get me out of this hole, I know this one is a guarantee to get things sparking. Money, I hate it but I'm going to have to learn to put it as a top priority now and for times to come. That is if I want to make it BIG. I'll become a thief and outrun the law by foot or car. Maybe not, but I can certainly write about it, I hope. I mean the haven't taken freedom of speech away yet, right? Killin' pigs, G-snatchin' pussy, and stealing money. These are just thoughts I can type out freely like Eminem or any other rapper. Yes, I have been listening to the rap music lately. I'm totally 'bout to game up some Grand Theft Auto 3 and listen to Game Radio all day, shit! Then Afterward, I'm going to run around my block and break some serious sweat. Then I'll take a shit, shave, and shower and drive out to a bar and pick up a job as a bartender. I'll take drink orders but if you try to start shit in my bar, you'll have to fight me and trust me, you will lose. After cleaning up the bar and closing everything up, I'll collect that pay and count my tips. I'll put that cash in a jar in my room and save it until I have enough to get own place. Lookin' for me? I'm under the ground, dig me up.

Now then, here's some artwork and some other cool shit I felt like posting.

Peace, Dude.

It ain't easy being Kerby. But someone's got to be able to bring clarity to this chaotic world. Nobody has time to look around and see the true value or natural order of things. They're all too busy fixing problems created by their own leaders. Everybody's always fighting to get to the top but me, I just want to smoke and chill. And I think everyone else should just smoke and chill as well. If everyone weren't always uptight and arguing over little things, we could finally give peace a chance. The way John Lennon wanted, not Vladimir Lenin or anyone else like him who thinks they know how the world should be run. Put your efforts into technology. Get rid of the money. Get rid of the government. Implement world peace. Let technology distribute the goods and necessities of life and survival. If we work together, we can find a way to harness the Earth's full power and potential. Maybe then we'll be set for space exploration. I guess it wouldn't hurt to smoke a few spliffs here and there either. Look, all I'm saying is give peace a chance. Yes I was high when I wrote this, 'cause I don't give a fuck if you don't like my shit. It's only a northern song. Just remember that.

Now here's some cool pictures I did with a little help form my friend Photoshop, or as I like to call him, Shoop Dawg. The first one is my new "Herb Kerby" logo I've recently completed. You better not take my logo 'cause that shit's patented and I'll sue you. The other pictures are some other Shoops of me getting out of my Lambo C. after hot-boxing it and driving around the galaxy. Yeah, my car can take flight. It's got anti-gravity mods, so what? Don't ask me how I made it or how it works for that matter. I just fly around getting high with the vaporizer air-conditioning that circulates vaporized marijuana throughout the interior of my car. 400 a zip, that's what I'm on. Peace, dude.

But we've got the biggest balls of them all...

It was 2010. Then all of a sudden, it turned 2011. I was on the dance floor, dancin' on all these rave girls. I looked around and saw everyone else grindin' on each other listening to the beat and the bass as it takes us on an incredible journey. A spectrum of colors embraced the crowd of spectators. It smelled a bit like throw up from all those ravers who took it just a bit too far. My body was moving to the beat until sweat poured over my face. I had to splash my water over my face and chest and take a breath to cool down. The music was compiled and brought to my ears by an artist who calls himself Girl Talk. I was drugged much like how everyone else was. Can you guess what I took before seeing Girl Talk at Milwaukee's Rave on New Years 2011? I'll give you a hint, I was flippin'! Candy flipin' that is. If you don't know what that is well look it up, I don't want to be your personal Urban Dictionary, shit. And if your wondering how I felt, the answer is fan-motherfucking-tastic! I can't believe people narrow their options down to just one drug on new years eve; alcohol. Yeah, let's get drunk! No thanks, I'm good with all these hallucinogens I just ate! They make me feel great! And smart! And trippin' balls! And I had to go to work the next day and I felt just fine! I can only imagine how many people just felt like total shit on new years day... "Oh, I shouldn't have drinken all those jager-bombs with vodka chasers last night." Is what they might say "I should've just took a bunch of hard drugs like acid or ecstasy like The Herb Kerby did, maybe then I wouldn't have called in sick to work from being so hungover." I bet that's what you said on new years day...
I had special plans for that night. I planned well in advance to make sure I had one hell of a night on new years 2011. Drugs, check. Tickets, check. Cash, check. Phone, check. Marijuana, wait where is my weed? Oh shit, I forgot to bring joints and I'm already through the doors! Good thing my buddy came through in that department! You should have seen the great sigh of relieve I exhaled when I found out my good friend sneaked three spliffs into the club and then you should have seen the joyous face I had once I inhaled those spliffs. What a good night. I found myself dancing with a kind of f'ugly chick earlier in the night and my penis that was being dry rubbed through my pants was not enjoying the company. I later found a much more exquisite girl to dance with however, the dance was quite brief and I found myself dancing with no one at all after that. I can blame no one but myself. Nasty habits and awkward mishaps in the past have left me on the dance floor without a dance partner for a majority of the night. I didn't let it get me down, especially with all those chemicals I had running through my head. Maybe the next dance I go to, I'll have a hot little number to strut my stuff against. The question is, can that little lady handle this big brain of mine. Not to mention my other big brain I got in my pants. 'Cause I'm upper, upper class high society. God's gift to ballroom notoriety. And I always fill my ballroom, the event is never small. The social papers say I've got the biggest balls of all...

Now here's some photographs, drawings, and shoopings to kick off the 2011 new year!